SECU Family House at UNC Hospitals Testimonials
"To teach is to touch a life forever..." So goes a tried and true mantra exemplified by Lucille "Lu" Phelps, teacher extraordinaire at Tucker Creek Middle School in Havelock, North Carolina, and a former guest at SECU Family House. Just over a year ago, this chorus teacher was diagnosed with stage-4 breast cancer. Enduring months of treatment at UNC Hospitals—yet buoyed by her husband David, two daughters, Sarah Beth and Rachel Anne and countless students—Lu somehow smiled through the whole ordeal, showing us and our guests why our "home away from home" plays such a vital role in our community and the healing process.Lu taught us the value of setting goals. This past year, she completed her Masters degree in school administration while undergoing chemotherapy and radiation. In May, she spent her evenings at the House in the library, cutting out fabric that she was going to sew into curtains. She consistently shared with others that one of her measures of progress during her treatment was the projects she completed.
When the radiation treatment sapped her energy, she found strength in her contacts with the other guests staying at the house—listening, sharing, eating and cooking meals with newfound friends. She said that Family House was "a place to heal" and that one quickly realizes that being here "you become part of something that becomes more than the disease itself."
It was a beautiful spring day when Lu was getting ready to leave Family House. As she said her goodbyes, her vocabulary was filled with the words "love, medicine, healing and compassion." In her quiet, unassuming, cheerful way of both giving and receiving small kindnesses, this middle school chorus teacher from a small town on the coast proved the meaning of those words and gave us all an emblem of patience and fortitude in the face of fear.
Submitted by Hadley Kifner, Volunteer and Marketing Coordinator, SECU Family House
THANK YOU for being an organization that truly cares about people. I could not have been more proud to be a member of the SECU after recently learning about the SECU Family House at UNC in Chapel Hill.
Some dear friends of ours (Gary and Debbie Shugart) were recently very blessed with the use of the facility while their 22 year old son (Dylan) was in UNC Hospital. On Saturday evening, May 31st 2008 Dylan went home to be with the Lord after his long battle in the hospital.
I just wanted to THANK YOU and those part of the SECU Family House for being there for our friends and helping provide them with a very nice place close to the hospital to stay. Thanks for helping to make the most difficult time of their life more bearable. They spoke very highly of the facility and the staff. No doubt the Family House will continue to be a blessing to many more families.
Thanks again,
Bryan Woodlief
Linda Berry Brewington believes that SECU Family House was built just for her. "I feel God opened this place, just in time, just for me" While she knows that the House was built for others like her across the state and country too, she feels a personal connection to the mission of the House. With serious, hopeful brown eyes, she will tell you, "My life has changed. Things came together for me here. This place has given me hope."
Hope is what she has clung to for the past two and a half months. On March 14, in a rural area just outside of Southern Pines, Linda’s 18-year old daughter Selena suffered a traumatic blow to the head. Immediately after the trauma, Selena was taken to Moore Regional Hospital. Several days later, when more specialized treatment was required, she was transferred to UNC’s Neurosurgery Intensive Care Unit. Linda visited Selena at UNC every day, sleeping in nooks and crannies in the hospital that she could find, and dedicated herself to assuring her "baby" that they would make it out of this together.
When the UNC social worker assigned to Selena’s care team approached Linda about finding better sleeping arrangements at a new place called Family House, Linda resisted. "It was too far from my baby and I wasn’t going to leave her," she explains. After the social worker’s persistence and when exhaustion began to take its toll on Linda, she agreed to try out Family House. She would give it a night and see what it was like. She liked what she saw and decided that Room 114 would be an okay place to rest her head for the next few weeks.
After staying at the House for over a month and learning she could still support Selena in the ways she needs to, Linda admits that she is grateful her stubbornness did not keep her from coming to Family House. For the first time in a long time, she says, I have been able to "look around and see that I am not all alone, by myself. I have found friends here and they have blessed my heart." Linda’s Family House friends would agree that they not only supported her in her time of need but she supported them as well. A few share stories of Linda visiting their loved ones in the hospital and praying for them as if they were her own family. Others recall that she helped in the kitchen preparing meals and encouraging them to stay strong and not give up. Anyone who met Linda knew that her motto was, "life’s hard knocks can make you bitter or better." Linda and her Family House friends seem to have collectively decided to be better and not let their circumstances dictate their attitudes.
At the end of May, Selena was medically stable enough to be moved to Wake Medical Rehabilitative Center in Raleigh. There she will endure weeks of intense therapy and hopefully begin working her way back to recovery. Of course, Linda will be right by her side. There is no Family House there and Linda will be on her own, maybe even sleeping in waiting rooms again. However, she believes that the rest she received while at Family House gave her the vision she needed "to stay focused and upbeat for my baby."
On the day she checked out and left Chapel Hill, there were no tears or sorrow. Linda passed out hugs, blessings, and cards to all she met while staying at Family House. She told everyone she saw how grateful she was and was quick to add that her claim to fame is being the first Native American woman to ever stay at the House. " It was meant to be," she says with pride.
Submitted by Hadley Kifner, Volunteer and Marketing Coordinator, SECU Family House
My husband Jim completed a stem cell transplant today at UNC Hospital. While he was preparing for the transplant we both stayed at the Family House, and while he was hospitalized for three weeks, I was fortunate enough to stay at the Family House. Now we are both staying here in an isolation suite as he recovers and must stay close to the hospital for the next few weeks. The Family House has been a blessing! The staff have all been welcoming and wonderful. The community has opened its arms to the Family House as well, preparing and bringing food from time to time. In particular Trader Joe's has been generous in sharing food. After a long day at the hospital, cooking is the last thing on a family member's mind. The friendly and free shuttle service has been another blessing, taking us to and from the hospital in a timely manner. The rooms are comfortable and well appointed. We love the kitchen and the library and the wireless internet connections. All the guests I have met are only complimentary of the SECU house and are grateful for the opportunity to stay in a community of caring and sharing. We feel safe, comfortable and nurtured. It is a beautiful facility. I want to take this opportunity to thank everyone for the time, money and commitment that the SECU Foundation has for the Chapel Hill community. When we were preparing for our stay, we had no idea that such a place even existed. When we heard about the Family House, it was an answer to our prayers. My husband and I will never forget our stay in the Family House.
Thank you.
Ann Calandro
Waxhaw, NC
